A cup of tea and a card game

It’s been 7 weeks and 4 days since he left us. My son loved Thanksgiving and this one was going to be hard.  Initially,  I wanted to opt out but my spouse Randy seemed to really want to enjoy a turkey dinner and his family had invited us so I woke up this morning and made a trifle to contribute. Randy’s family are wonderful people: they had set a place setting for my son unbeknownst to me, complete with a framed photo of Sam and his girlfriend taken almost a year ago. 

I pay attention for signs these days: always hoping for one from my boy. They never get old and I appreciate every moment that I feel he has something to do with.  And tonight,  I felt him there with us. 

After dinner,  Randy’s Aunt made tea and she served us all in fancy cups with saucers.  I had drank almost half of mine when I noticed the cup :  It had CFB Trenton written inside the cup. Mine was the only cup like this at the table. It was a souvenir tea cup from a military base in Eastern Canada.    CFB stands for Canadian Forces Base. Trenton,  is almost 5000 kms away from here, in Ontario. It’s not only where I moved here from 4 years ago – 2 years before I met Randy: it’s also where Sam was when he died.  Randy’s family has no affiliation to our military,  and they had no idea that I had lived there. Or that Sam had died there.  In fact,  Randy’s aunt had no idea where the cup had even come from.

The night got stranger after that.

I noticed a flash of light on the ceiling: almost like you would see if the glass of your watch reflected off the sunlight.  Except it was already after dark. Shortly after that flash,  we played a card game called ” golf”. The point of this game is to have the lowest number of cards at the end of each hand.  Kings, jokers, and ace cards are the ultimate goal; beyond that you need duplicates to zero out your number cards. There is not much strategy to the game: its more ” luck of the draw”.  I’m not much of a card player to say the least, but the hands dealt to me  were all loaded with kings, jokers and aces. And the numbered cards I did draw,  were duplicates. We played nine hands:   I won almost every hand.  My overall score was more than 20 points lower than the closest player, so I won the overall game.   It was surreal. Throughout the evening ,  I kept Sam’s framed picture on the table in front of me.

I miss my son more than I can possibly explain. I wish he was here.  I wish my phone would ring right now,  and when I answered it,  I would hear his familiar ” hey ma”. But I really felt like he had a ” hand” in that card game tonight.  I’m just not that lucky,  nor am I any good at cards games.  And that tea cup! What are the odds?

Published by iamtherealjude

I am a mother of four beautiful grown children. My son Sam: My youngest boy, lost his fight with his demons on Aug 19, 2021. This blog is a dedication to my sweet young man who I will forever look for in the beauty of this world until my last breath.

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